Middle of the Road

What I have felt this week was rather indescribable. I barely blog but it seems like writing about how I feel actually helps me balance myself. I see every angle of my current life with all unfinished businesses. From love life to career, nothing seemed to be in order. I found myself in the middle of the intersecting roads not knowing which way to take; I was distraught, perhaps depressed and all i did was slumped like a rotund and stayed at the center of them all. I have mixed feelings of sadness, irritation and confusion. I have many questions I don't have answers for and still try to figure out how to get solutions to these equations. I normally write poems to free myself from these clusters, but lately I couldn't come up with anything. This is somehow the reason I end up writing this musing. I knew that talking to friends can always help, but I am the type of person who prefer keeping things to myself. However, I tried it this time, talked to someone not really close to me but I have a huge respect for her and see her more of a leader than a close friend. But I trusted her, for my own personal reason I do...trust her. I wrote her a letter, told her most of my troubles, not in details but she is a very intelligent woman, and writing a litany of them all wouldn't be necessary and she respects my way of disclosing myself to her. She didn't suggest probable solutions, she is not the dictating type that would tell you what should or shouldn't be done about them. She just lend me her ears, allowed me to use my voice then finally gave me her understanding, not judgement, pure understanding. So magical that I felt a lot better after few exchanges of emails. My problems still need to be taken care of, but that's not the point here, it's how I felt about them before and after I have talked to her. Now I am still in the middle of the road, only this time, choosing which way to go wouldn't be difficult to decide on anymore. My sincerest thanks to her.